Show HN: Make cursed fonts like Times New Bastard

(bastardica.mitpit.com)

853 points | by MitPitt 3 days ago

71 comments

  • ycombiredd 1 day ago
    So at first I misunderstood your tool, thinking it was like a tool I made a little over a year ago that creates new fonts from existing font glyph paths, combining them in a couple of ways. It began as an ambigram generator (png image) using an arbitrary ttf or woff of your choosing and once I had that working, I realized that since I was just transforming vector paths, I could mix paths from multiple fonts, still focusing on ambigram generation.

    Eventually, scope crept until it became an interesting and useful thing to be able to combine say, the top half of Arial with the bottom half of Times New Roman's letters (and combine with various boolean operations on the paths, with outlines, etc, and I assumed others would be as pleased with this ability as I was, so I documented some examples and shared it here and in a fontography subreddit.

    To my surprise, it got essentially no interest when I posted here, and the response from the typography folks was basically negative with people somehow framing it as a piracy-adjacent thing, and not a fun thing to do, just mashing up vector paths to get interesting unique results. shrug

    Seems like you and maybe some other participants in this discussion might actually appreciate this little tool and get some enjoyment and perhaps utility out of it, so I'll share it here. https://github.com/scottvr/fambigen

    There are examples in the README that show what it does in ambigram mode or "font compositor" mode. Enjoy!

    • amoss 1 day ago
      Your tool looks interesting but the readme file is very "wall of text" heavy and example light. In comparison the site for this tool shows exactly what it does. Perhaps that explains the difference in response. This is a classic case of the need for "show don't tell".
      • ycombiredd 1 day ago
        Sounds reasonable. I have a marketing problem. To restate what I get from your and other comments:

        If I really want to spread something that brings me joy to other people so that they might experience it too, I may have to resort to polishing up the presentation. The fact that I'm trying to give something with no strings does not obviate the need to make it look palatable. This is a reasonable take I think. I also think I've known and have had a sense for that, even if I try to ignore it, because "selling" something is typically uninteresting to me. I'll try to keep it in mind the next time I have something I think I want to share with strangers, and put more effort into how it is presented so they might be more inclined to look into the actual thing I'm trying to show them.

        I'll make my own analogy, with it being like trying to share a chocolate cake that looks like literal turds to strangers.

        • preommr 1 day ago
          > I may have to resort to polishing up the presentation. The fact that I'm trying to give something with no strings does not obviate the need to make it look palatable.

          People say shit like this when they're the producer. But then turn around and nitpick when they're the consumer.

          It's not selling something, it's about it being a proxy for if you understand the product well enough to communicate it's key points.

          To wrongly quote Twain: "I would have written a shorter letter, but did not have the time"

    • aargh_aargh 1 day ago
      I'm just a regular Joe, no font expertise.

      Sorry for the brutal honesty, just thought it might offer you an explanation of the difference in reaction.

      OP's fonts look ugly, but intentionally and purposefully so, in a nails-on-chalkboard manner. In contrast, your example images just look plain ugly to me, can't imagine I would have any use for them.

      Sorry again. I do understand the technological fascination with the process, just describing the aestheticity of the result here.

      • brettermeier 1 day ago
        Ugly I wouldn't say, it's liked glitched and noisy of some kind. Like any art it can be nice in some contexts.
        • Barbing 1 day ago
          More smaller font examples, just like in the OP, would help evaluate.

          Essentially mirroring the original post, but using the fonts of their own [re]design.

      • dostick 1 day ago
        The difference is that today's tool has a demo website that makes the whole thing self-explanatory. Yours is a repository that speaks "figure it out".
        • xp84 1 day ago
          This comment comes off as unnecessarily negative. They didn’t say they were mad that it didn’t get interest, and just shared it in case it may find an audience here. If you’re actually intending to give constructive advice rather than to discourage them or make them feel bad, there may have been a better way to say that.

          Edit: such as amoss’s comment.

        • paulhebert 1 day ago
          This is cool! Thanks for sharing
        • mortenjorck 2 days ago
          I have never felt quite so cacklingly nefarious as a designer as I did just now carefully adjusting vertical scale and offset so that the x-height and baseline of Papyrus optically match Comic Sans when mixed together.

          I don't yet know who I'll be pranking with the downloaded font, but I look forward to their reaction.

        • krelas 2 days ago
          If you want to make a designer have a nervous breakdown, upload a copy of Helvetica and make every second or third character be Arial.
          • calm down, Satan
            • Someone 1 day ago
              With ligatures, you could have a Helvetica font that writes “Helvetica”, “beautiful” and “aesthetics” in Arial.
              • goodmythical 2 days ago
                All S/E/R/I/F characters in a sans-serif font with the serif equivalent.
            • tholman 1 day ago
              Fun story, a good... (checks calendar, oh lord) 8+ years ago, I made a mis-kerned version of helvetica (smelvetica i called it [1]) as a joke, and eventually had the lawyers push on me

              > we ask that you stop promoting ‘Smelvetica’ and making the font software available to everybody. Next time, just let us know if you have more ideas on how to modernize our classics, we are always open for creative input.

              - [1](https://tholman.com/post/smelvetica/)

              • Fliwatt 2 days ago
                There is a lot of fun stuff you can do with fonts. A friend of mine made a self-censoring font: Paranoia Sans https://github.com/flegfleg/Paranoia-Sans
                • Sharlin 2 days ago
                  Inspired by the sample text for "Nervous Sans": "Anal", an Arial with bad keming
                • altairprime 2 days ago
                  Temu Sans is an absolutely beautiful demo choice. I love this. Thank you for making it.
                  • kstrauser 2 days ago
                    That was one of the few recent times I've LOLed at a Hacker News article. Flawless.
                    • ryandrake 1 day ago
                      We have all seen that actual font in real life, too! Amazing in 2026, “text on paper” is a challenge.
                      • Jarmsy 1 day ago
                        What's the actual process that leads to this look in reality?
                        • projektfu 1 day ago
                          I'm wondering the same thing. Something about making proportional fonts fit into blocks for Chinese text?
                      • beAbU 1 day ago
                        All those presets are brilliantly named.
                      • dvh 2 days ago
                        For extra fun, you can make font that are the same as original but then you add ligature for some words and you make ligature using the same font but spelling different word. For example "red" ligature will be "green".
                        • someonebaggy 2 days ago
                          Do this on a document to determine who is copy-pasting or reading it with AI.
                          • smeehee 2 days ago
                            Fun though the idea is, assistive technologies such as TTS will also have problems with it.
                            • servo_sausage 1 day ago
                              Accessibility should only ever be an addition, never a limit.
                              • Semkas 1 day ago
                                Why should that be true?
                                • servo_sausage 1 day ago
                                  Because proposing to limit something needs better justification than a fundamentally limited group can't use it.

                                  It's an out of place performative moralism.

                                  • Semkas 1 day ago
                                    We will all become, or temporarily be, fundamentally limited at times in our life.

                                    It's trivial to build something that accommodates an ideal user, the challenge in software engineering is creating a solution that suits many kinds of people, at different points in their life. Refusing to engage with that challenge is a kind of proud mediocrity.

                                    • ryandrake 1 day ago
                                      Engineering is fundamentally about building within limitations.
                              • amenghra 2 days ago
                                Do this as a captcha ;)
                            • 6thbit 2 days ago
                              Huh, didn't know the font could control variations over nth glyhph!

                              Could one make in theory a regular monospaced font to just render glyphs past 80 chars of a line as bad as possible?

                              • california-og 2 days ago
                                Some of these effects are actually really easy to do with CSS @font-face & unicode-range. See: view-source:https://hlnet.neocities.org/font-face-tricks
                                • dyingkneepad 2 days ago
                                  Royal Ransom Note just downloaded! It will be great to never have to cut magazines again!
                                  • sasaf5 1 day ago
                                    Oh, and all the glueing it takes... I hate that part.
                                  • jurf 1 day ago
                                    Ah, yes, the central Europe experience. When I was a kid, all fonts looked like this, because almost none had ďíáčríťíčš, so text was full of fallback, out-of-place characters.
                                    • philjohn 2 days ago
                                      temu sans is beautifully on point
                                      • Sharlin 2 days ago
                                        More subtle keming adjustments so that the font looks just slightly "off" would be great too.
                                        • thenthenthen 1 day ago
                                          Love the Temu variation. You can just use a ‘Chinese’ font and type roman text as well. Most of these fonts use a fixed width for Chinese glyphs, as wel as for the western characters, so i,l,f etc all have ‘extra’ white space around them, resulting in the ‘Temu’ effect, it is absolutely everywhere here in China.
                                          • tuetuopay 1 day ago
                                            Thanks, I always wondered why this was the case with latin text from CJK countries, as they use the same computers and software than the west, they should be able to do kerning right. I guess the original designers of those fonts are to blame for not making the latin characters "properly" monospace so that it still works.
                                            • thenthenthen 1 day ago
                                              Can give the designers some slack, drawing 5000+ gliphs is not an easy task.
                                              • Sharlin 1 day ago
                                                The latin part of CJK fonts is often some crappy Times clone that they throw in as an afterthought.
                                              • deburo 1 day ago
                                                Ah, so that's why. Do the big Chinese companies handle this well? Alibaba, perhaps? Huawei, surely? By owning the packaging and shipping?
                                              • Asterism 2 days ago
                                                Very dean and modem
                                                • shmeeed 2 days ago
                                                  >keming

                                                  I saw what you did there

                                              • gerdesj 2 days ago
                                                I'm old enough to remember newspaper articles with kerning like that.
                                              • This is great!

                                                FYI for the creator, I'm hitting an error when attempting to change the mix-in font (Webkit/iOS):

                                                  Something went wrong: Out of bounds memory access (evaluating '_PyRun_SimpleString(r)')
                                                • dspillett 1 day ago
                                                  To either heighten or smooth out the effect, you could use ligature support. Perhaps for double-letters (like the tt in letter) only change one of the pair.

                                                  Heck, while you are messing around with ligatures you could be really evil and use them to introduce typos, or unwanted corrections (color→colour)…

                                                  • ZeWaka 2 days ago
                                                    This is beautiful. I think I'll have to use this for a game.
                                                    • cluckindan 2 days ago
                                                      Beware of licensing.
                                                      • demaga 2 days ago
                                                        I was thinking the same. Seems like a perfect fit for an 'escape simulator' room.
                                                      • thewakalix 2 days ago
                                                        > Bastardica can make simple fonts feel a little, hmm, richer?

                                                        This is truly the YTP of fonts.

                                                        • hackeryojo 1 day ago
                                                          I have been looking for this for a very long time without knowing I have been looking for it. Royal Ransom especially is a masterpiece, I will be writing all of my work emails in these fonts from now on. Thank you. (I work for myself btw)
                                                          • furyofantares 2 days ago
                                                            Nice! It even supports COLR and SVG fonts, both of which I have options for when making a variant of my Keldritch font (https://kellydornhaus.com/keldritch/)
                                                            • xrd 1 day ago
                                                              If I'm reading this correctly, this tool generates a new font by mixing fonts and altering proprieties of the fonts. In other words, a new font is produced.

                                                              Could you produce similar effects using pure CSS and/or JavaScript? Maybe it would be less deterministic and maybe the rendering would be slower, but could you do it this way?

                                                              • RandyOrion 1 day ago
                                                                Hilarious. My first thought on these fonts is that similar clip art style text is frequently used in Persona 5. Now I know this is an active design choice.

                                                                P.S. I saw keming and my mind went blank for a little while.

                                                                • qurren 2 days ago
                                                                  My LinkedIn UI already looks like that

                                                                  https://imgur.com/a/FCmzWNa

                                                                  and I don't know who to report it to. I guess it's owned by Microsoft so also not surprised.

                                                                  • lelanthran 2 days ago
                                                                    I have to admit, I spent way more time on this than required (giggling madly at my creations)
                                                                    • ayaros 1 day ago
                                                                      If you really wanted to let me be a sneaky bastard, you'd let me mix Helvetica with Arial every nth glyph.

                                                                      (...and yes, I see I'm not the first to suggest this.)

                                                                      • This is interesting -- not from the perspective of different fonts (although that's interesting too!), but from the perspective of it's a web page that can apparently render fonts on the fly...

                                                                        That means that it's probably using some library in JavaScript or WASM to implement that.

                                                                        If that's the case, then I'm thinking, you know, that functionality, that is, font rendering on demand could, in theory, be placed into a CloudFlare Worker (or other Serverless service, i.e. AWS Lambda, Azure Functions, Google Cloud Functions, OCI Funcions, IBM Cloud Code Engine, Alibaba Function Compute, etc., etc.)...

                                                                        That could be useful for a variety of applications... including (but not limited to!) word processors, typesetting software, homemade browsers, online games, heck, really anything where custom fonts are needed...

                                                                        There could be two distinct benefits with this, let's call it a "FaaS" (Fonts as a Service!) idea:

                                                                        1) No need to bundle/ship/include a font rendering engine with software that needs one.

                                                                        2) Extra layer of security -- Local font rendering software is typically Turing-Complete, and as such, the local font renderer could potentially run viruses and other unwanted programs. I.e., local font rendering is a security risk. By hermetically sealing that code into serverless function, offsite of the local machine and having that serverless function send only fully rendered font data one way, the attack surface of the font rendering engine is effectively removed from any local PC.

                                                                        This being said, the disadvantage is that it couldn't be used if the Internet or server or cloud provider is down for any reason.

                                                                        Graphical font data, once created and downloaded, could however be cached by clients for offline situations / offline usage / offline work.

                                                                        So, there are some interesting ideas here...

                                                                        • hypfer 2 days ago
                                                                          I've been recently thinking about custom fonts and ligatures to create a captcha mechanism that is easy to solve for humans but confuses LLMs.

                                                                          Something like a dynamically generated font where some letters look different, and you have to count details or write down a word or [idea not yet fleshed out].

                                                                          Won't stop someone dedicated, of course, but nothing will.

                                                                          • ctoth 1 day ago
                                                                            I use a screen reader. Please do not do this.
                                                                          • m463 2 days ago
                                                                            Not much different from lots of the optional font packages you can install on linux...

                                                                            :)

                                                                            EDIT: I think larabie fonts? I do like pupcat though.

                                                                            • dumbfounder 1 day ago
                                                                              I thought you could put in natural language and generate a font. But you can’t. So I made one where you can: https://fonts.buttface.rocks/
                                                                              • TomMasz 1 day ago
                                                                                Even the font names are great. I can't think of use for any of these, but I'll keep them in mind should the need ever arise.
                                                                                • flockonus 2 days ago
                                                                                  Such a cool idea, breath in new live to old fonts!

                                                                                  I wonder what's the footprint and overall efficiency of making a new font vs. combining old ones on client side (typically JS)?

                                                                                  • thecaio 2 days ago
                                                                                    Temu Sans cracked me up
                                                                                    • abdusco 2 days ago
                                                                                      I kinda dig Impacter. It looks quite stylish IMO.
                                                                                      • Aduttya 1 day ago
                                                                                        Looking at current AI apps it's more of an integrater into current LLMs rather replacement?
                                                                                        • patriciobcs 2 days ago
                                                                                          cool app, maybe make the logo at the bottom clickable so is easier to see the main page, also very cool.
                                                                                          • timz 1 day ago
                                                                                            Could we try with Google Fonts somehow?
                                                                                            • DylanMerigaud 1 day ago
                                                                                              Scope creep transformed your ambigram tool into something interesting.
                                                                                              • Rinkia 1 day ago
                                                                                                created the ultimate monster, papyrus + comic sans every 3 glyph
                                                                                                • CodeWriter23 1 day ago
                                                                                                  This is some derangement I can get into.
                                                                                                  • schnebbau 1 day ago
                                                                                                    Well today I learned corner-shape is a CSS property now.
                                                                                                    • dzulp0d 1 day ago
                                                                                                      Love it. Also, why do shady electronic manuals look like that?
                                                                                                      • epiccoleman 2 days ago
                                                                                                        Love this, I had a lot of fun and more than a few laughs messing around with it.
                                                                                                        • mock-possum 2 days ago
                                                                                                          Whoa this is really cool. Wish I had an excuse to use it for something… hmmm.
                                                                                                          • hmartin 2 days ago
                                                                                                            Also clicking the logo is really fun!
                                                                                                          • I love it! Every click on the title will also change its bastard font :-)
                                                                                                            • htrp 2 days ago
                                                                                                              This looks like the cut out magazine ransom letters you see in every movie.
                                                                                                              • Sharlin 2 days ago
                                                                                                                Scroll down, they have an explicit example (with more fonts mixed in)
                                                                                                              • xnx 2 days ago
                                                                                                                Nice logo interaction too!
                                                                                                                • logicallee 2 days ago
                                                                                                                  Nice, I like it. The fonts are very interesting and captivating.
                                                                                                                  • This is absolutely diabolical and should not be put into the hands of humanity.

                                                                                                                    What have you unleashed? Hey, look guys we got the next Oppenheimer over here.

                                                                                                                    • jrochkind1 2 days ago
                                                                                                                      Thanks, I love-hate it.
                                                                                                                      • newtwentysix 1 day ago
                                                                                                                        Good one. My friends are having a fun time
                                                                                                                        • sumit734655 1 day ago
                                                                                                                          Head panel jecne ke liye
                                                                                                                          • micheljansen 1 day ago
                                                                                                                            Temu Sans is very on the nose.
                                                                                                                            • DonHopkins 1 day ago
                                                                                                                              I wish I could make Dijkstra Dingbats.
                                                                                                                              • busymom0 2 days ago
                                                                                                                                Bookmarked for future use!
                                                                                                                                • omegadynamics 1 day ago
                                                                                                                                  this is just Grotesk
                                                                                                                                  • cengizIO 1 day ago
                                                                                                                                    This is exactly what I needed right now. Somehow, it made me cry out of disgust, anger, anguish, and acceptance all at once. Sneaky Bastard is now my default Obsidian font.
                                                                                                                                    • zf00002 2 days ago
                                                                                                                                      Really fun op!
                                                                                                                                      • phren0logy 2 days ago
                                                                                                                                        Thanks, I hate it.
                                                                                                                                        • shagie 1 day ago
                                                                                                                                          Courier mixed with courier, but every 11th glyph is scaled 80% vertically (retains 100% horizontal). Monospace remains, but things are off.
                                                                                                                                        • repple 1 day ago
                                                                                                                                          love it! Temu Sans.. hahaha
                                                                                                                                          • lathoa 2 days ago
                                                                                                                                            I like it
                                                                                                                                            • aanet 2 days ago
                                                                                                                                              My eyes!!!
                                                                                                                                              • khalic 2 days ago
                                                                                                                                                Seeing the results makes me unreasonably angry… nice job :D
                                                                                                                                                • smugglerFlynn 1 day ago
                                                                                                                                                  This is seriously cool, Mitya
                                                                                                                                                  • vpribish 1 day ago
                                                                                                                                                    you earned my upvote simple with the name "Times New Bastard". goddamn
                                                                                                                                                    • samteeeee 1 day ago
                                                                                                                                                      LOLed at "Temu Sans"
                                                                                                                                                      • 0gs 2 days ago
                                                                                                                                                        if people want to play with font generation in a non joke -- and frankly way LESS impressive -- manner, i made likeface.net too. it's a little buggy. but it's cheap and it's generous with redraws
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